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An Open Letter To Peyton Manning From A Chiefs Fan

We'll just start this off by saying that this is predicated upon the Indianapolis Colts letting their hall-of-fame quarterback leave for another city as they turn towards the future with Andrew Luck. I can think of 51 million reasons that the Colts won't keep both quarterbacks on their roster heading into next season.

Hi Peyton,

Let me start off this letter by saying that I understand that it can't be a good situation for you to hear everyone and their brother agreeing that letting you walk away from the city you helped build is the right decision for the Indianapolis Colts franchise. Sad, angry, distraught, confused and downright pissed off would be normal feelings for anyone right now. And there's probably only a few athletes in the world right now that could possibly understand anything close to what you're feeling. And to be honest, the guy typing on this keyboard isn't one of them. But with that said, there is a light at the end of the dark tunnel and that light is in my hometown and your future place of employment, Kansas City.

While many of the talking heads would like to think that you'd end up in San Francisco if given the choice, let me try and help you see a little bit of why Kansas City would be a better choice.

For starters, do you really think it'd be fair for Archie and Olivia to have to fly between San Francisco and New York to see their sons play? That's just WAY too much traveling for you to put on your parents just because Frank Gore is considered a top-tier running back and the Golden Gate bridge is a marvel to look at. I'll tell you what, I'll personally throw in a flight for you to San Francisco in the offseason (and after the Super Bowl) to see the Golden Gate bridge, and I'll look forward to your first post-game press conference when trying to describe the awesomeness that is Jamaal Charles. Frank is good, Jamaal is better, moving on.

I know that you're one of the faces of the NFL and along with that responsibility comes endorsements and appearances on Leno, Letterman, and any Justin Timberlake commercial. The constant traveling between LA and New York would be tiring for anyone. It might be best to centrally locate so you can get to each coast with the ease and simplicity that a man of your stature deserves. Thay central location you ask? Yes, it's Kansas City. Moving on.

People in Kansas City LOVE oreos.

It's not huge surprise that you and Jeff Saturday have a bit of a bromance. Anyone who has stuck their hand up another man's ass for as long as you two have been rocking the hiker/hikee relationship should be a certain kind of close. Good for you that Kansas City loves old-ass centers. We've got one that's retiring any day now and we can go ahead and bring in Saturday to help you feel more at home.....under center. While we're at it, if Indy decides not to pay your old pal Reggie Wayne whatever he wants in a new contract, we might be able to work that out too. Especially if Dwayne Bowe doesn't feel like catching passes from a hall of famer for a contract that reflects his true value to this team. Moving on.

It wouldn't be too tough for you to look on the Chiefs roster for a couple of familar faces. You remember that offensive lineman that was allowed to walk away from the Colts a few years ago and at the time you were pretty confused on why the Colts let him go? Guess where he is? Kansas City, and not only does he play for the Chiefs. He grew up HERE and went to COLLEGE around here. Call your old friend Ryan Lilja and see what he has to say about Kansas City. You might be familiar with our coach too (Crennel will be HC), you two spent years dueling back and forth when he was the defensive coordinator with the New England Patriots. Moving on.

The best team in the AFC is a team that you are familiar with, the New England Patriots. If you move to the NFC you'll be competing with the Green Bay Packers, New Orleans Saints and Detroit Lions (yeah...I said it). You aren't as familiar with those teams and those stadiums and getting to a Super Bowl would be easier in Kansas City. While the NFC West looks like a pretty attractive conference to play in from week to week, it's not like the AFC West is crawling with top-tier teams right now. The division champions' quarterback is Tim Tebow for crying out loud. We were one blocked field-goal away from hosting a playoff game without two of our best players. Charles and Eric Berry. You're probably familiar with Berry because he after all....dominated and is at legend-status along with you at the University of Tennessee. 'Nuff said.

I understand that it's got to be deeper than just an old teammate, another collegiate legend at your Alma mater and that your center could come too. It's got to go back further. It's not surprise that your family is pro Ole Miss. I mean, your mom was homecoming queen there when your dad was throwing the pill around and your brother was a star quarterback there also. The speed limit on campus at Ole Miss is 18 MPH in honor of your dad for crying out loud. We've got three former Runnin' Rebels on the roster with Jerrell Powe, Kendrick Lewis and Dexter McCluster. These are players I'm sure your family is familiar with as they continued to follow their Alma mater. Moving on.

If that wasn't enough, we can also pay you a boat load of money and you would get to play Indy next year.


All Kansas Citians.