This is not intended to be serious so if you're looking for anything more than a quick laugh to distract you from work for the next seven minutes then I suggest you click on the next page.
I posed the question on twitter.
Again, writing a story for
@SBNKansasCity need quotes from#Chiefs fans. 50 things that will happen if Peyton signs in KC. funnier/better RT
These things will all happen if Peyton Manning signs with the Kansas City Chiefs, as told by different Chiefs fans.
1. Chiefs will win the West @tdehoff
2. Jon McGraw switches from plastic to paper if Peyton gets signed. @Kalophoenix
3. I will travel 7000 miles to watch a game....probably bigger things than that @chiefsinchina
4. chiefs signing Peyton would counteract the Mayan calendar @cowboynchrist
5. Sales of Oreo cookies would skyrocket in Kansas City
6. Clark Hunt would make money
7. Matt Cassel will cry @tdehoff
8. Peyton gets an assistant to follow him around picking up his candy wrappers. @Chief_Wildcat
9. If Peyton signs in Kansas City, I'm naming my first born after him. @TheFilmRoom
10. Peyton's arm and neck make a full recovery only to have T.J. break his thumb in training camp. @Chief_Wildcat
11. We have 2 years until the next rebuild. @DThomasReigns
12. Justin Timberlake sings the national anthem, every Sunday.
13. Haley whips Pioli's ass for sticking him with Cassel and getting Manning now that he's gone. @tdehoff
14. Some dude at a pizza joint in KC feels vindicated
15. Arrowhead Pride explodes
16. Dwayne Bowe signs and becomes greatest Chiefs wide receiver of all-time, if he isn't already.
17. Peyton gets a company paid, tapped cell phone with unlimited minutes and a security cam in his locker. @Chief_Wildcat
18. Headline. Matt cassel saves crippled manning from burning home @njh09
19. as a Pastor in Indiana, I can wear a red #18 Manning jersey every Sunday. @aarbrock
20. Peyton Manning will do a Mastercard commercial from Oklahoma Joe's - "Cook that meat! Cook that meat!" @Chief_Wildcat
21. I will fly to San Diego, buy you a beer, see a couple giraffes, and fly home #DeadSerious @Teeeenwolf
22. i got shot of patron @bkissel7
23. I've got a BOTTLE of Patron if you both are in KS at the same time. @KaloPhoenix
24. I have a shot and a half of Czech absinthe and some honey whiskey moonshine I'll throw in too. @AnAverageGatsby
25. Jeremy Lin will sign with the Miami Heat
26. Tyler Palko finds out he's not returning
27. Chris Sembower will create the best "Posterized" in history
28. Scott Pioli will be given Key to the City
29. The war on terror will end
30. Fox News will endorse Obama
31. Larry Johnson will win "Man of the Year"
32. Nickelback will still suck
33. Cross Canadian Ragweed will get back together
34. My 50-1 $100 bet on the Chiefs to win the Super Bowl will pay for the bar tab I run up at the Super Bowl
35. Gus Johnson will sound overly excited
36. Hundreds of thousands of Kansas Citians will Web-MD search "Neck Problems"
37. Chris Weinke will be on 610 and 810 radio talking about recovery
38. There will be "Hoopla" involved
39. Commissioned season-ticket sales staff will be making it rain in Vegas very shortly
40. Scott Pioli will wear a shirt to the press conference that says "Tamper This!"
41. Kent Babb will write a story citing 28 people in Indiana that are pissed off at Peyton
42. Adam Teicher will give a video blog from his dungeon
43. Larry Johnson does his required community service by helping take down the Manning billboard in Miami
44. Tony Gonzalez will quietly say "damnit" to himself
45. Brian Daboll decides to rent in Kansas City, not buy
46. I'll honor my word and pay for him to go to San Francisco
47. Jeremy Lin, Tim Tebow, Brett Favre and your neck will sit in a room together, and ESPN will explode.
48. The Chiefs will win the division
49. The Chiefs will win the AFC
50. The Chiefs will win the Super Bowl
Did I miss something? Tell me about it @bkissel7